Upon My Liars Chair

Time goes by so fast.
It seems like I have lived in Cedar my whole life.
But heaven knows that I ache to go home almost every weekend.
I miss my family so darn much.
First semester is almost over and finals week is only a couple weeks away now.
That scares me to the bone.

I know that the song I am about to reference is a bit dark and depressing, but man is it cathartic.
Hurt by Johnny Cash (a cover of Nine Inch Nails), is bone quakingly beautiful. I swear if I wasn't in the university library, I would cry from just watching it on youtube.

I'm a hypocrite. I always put myself so much higher than everyone else in my mind, but when I see others do it, I call them out on it and get up in arms towards them.
It takes a lot of gumption to look yourself in the mirror and see what is painfully obvious. My roommate Emily said something last night about changing yourself. She said that it gives you a sort of elated feeling, like you can do anything. I completely agree with her statement.

I need to change a bunch of things.
I need to lose weight.
I need to get my homework done.
I need to stop procrastinating.
I need to take my life seriously and actually put my all into what I do.
I need to take pride in my work.
I need to be less judgmental.

To look at all those things is a daunting task. I could add almost 20 more things if I wanted to, but I will spare all of that for a later psychological evaluation.

Sorry I am so dark and depressing! Sometimes I just need to get it out and have no one talk back or give me the advise that I already know.

10 Things I am Grateful For:
1. Freedom of speech.
2. The ability to see others as how they are, not who they should be.
3. My cellphone.
4. My family, biological and adopted.
5. Sleep.
6. Music.
7. A roommate that doesn't judge me. Even though I have earned it.
8. Tattoos.
9. Johnny Cash.
10. Orange nail polish.


Love you all!!:)

Love,
Andie;)